15. Spring Has Sprung

Winter is definitely over now, it is a lot warmer and it's short sleeves weather during the day. Although it is raining at least once a week at the moment, just enough to delay starting the irrigation.

The grass is growing, although currently a little bit too slowly. We are still having to put out a bit of silage to supplement the cows diet and keep them level with the grazing plan.

A very efficient piece of kit.

500 cows have now calved leaving just 25 yet to do so. The majority of the calves have been weaned and are growing quickly, those that are still getting milk will catch up and in the next few months all the calves will be gone from the farm. The dairy heifers will be reared externally as replacements, the dairy bulls go for veal early on, and the beef calves will eventually end up in someones chili con carne. 

(Photo by Dana Holzmüller)

Future milkers

The later calvers were mostly served with beef animals, and the multi-coloured groups of calves in the calf shed show that. They are mostly part Hereford, the variation in the milking herd causes many different shades of brown, grey and ginger calves. Either way, they are all pretty stocky and have plenty of vigour.

 This chap is no more than 48 hours old.

There are a huge amount of ducks on the farm and they seem to have had a recent population boom. There are ducklings everywhere. I think the creek that runs through the middle of the block and the many pools and ponds make the perfect habitat for them.

I managed to catch one of the ducklings. I was going to keep it as a pet but its shrill squawking got incredibly annoying very quickly so I put it back with its family.

I also came across a mother duck sitting on her nest of eggs, she flew off before I could grab my camera. I considered for a second, grabbing a few for my breakfast, literally poached eggs, but I thought they probably had ducklings inside them all and also I'm not too sure how edible mallard eggs are.

Speaking of nests there is one being constructed in our car-port right now, by an All Black-bird. She has put safety first and built it right next to fire extinguisher, just in case. To be fair, the nest is made of dry grass and sticks.

Right that is all for today, I will leave you with a picture of the sun setting last night. The views continue to amaze and cause me to reach for the camera regularly.

14. Milking It For All It's Worth.

Having milked cows in NZ for over two months now, I thought it was about time to post about the actual milking. I just bought a waterproof case for my camera so I can take it into the milking shed without the very real risk of it being ruined. In my experience, it is easier to stay dry when swimming compared to milking cows. The case, which is actually just a glorified, high-tech sandwich bag, means that I could get a few action shots during this afternoons milking.

We milk twice a day, at 5:00 am and at 2:30 pm, in a 40 a side DeLaval swing-over herringbone. For those of you not familiar with milking parlours, this is what it looks like.

As you can see it is basically just a roof over the plant so there is plenty of opportunity for a nice fresh breeze to blow through the shed at 5am in the winter to stop any chance of overheating.

The swing-over system works in a very efficient use of time, so that whilst one side is being milked the other side is exiting and the next row entering and being rowed up. With two people milking, responsible for either the front or back half, 500 cows can be milked in less than two hours. This afternoon, myself and Dan milked 460 (approx) in an hour and a half.

Whilst the cows are being milked they get their ration of barley and molasses, which as well as providing an important energy boost helps distract them from the human playing around with their udders.

The barley is stored in these silos, the crusher in the middle is probably the noisiest piece of machinery ever created. It sounds as if someone has put nails in a giant paper shredder.

Here are a few of the pics from during milking

 All cupped on and standing still.

 Daniel speed-milking

 Note the look of concentration - clearly not morning milking

After the cows are milked their teats are sprayed with a solution containing Iodine, which reduces risk of infection (mastitis) by making the sprayed area inhospitable for bacteria, and Glycerine which reduces skin damage and keeps the teats supple.

Note the rubber gloves, which do not allow the spread of bacteria from cow to cow nearly as much as cracked and callused hands do. I had to have XL ones bought especially, the other sizes were preventing the blood from reaching my hands.

The shed is constantly being washed down as we milk, a clean environment makes for cleaner milk and lower levels of mastitis. 

The milk collected, at the moment about 11300 litres per day, is stored in this vat and collected at about 9pm every evening. 

It is very important to make sure that the seal around that door is on properly or it will leak. A mistake I will  not be repeating!

After the main herd has gone through, a smaller separate group containing cows receiving treatment in the form of antibiotics, lame cows and those that have just calved is milked. The milk is not suitable for human consumption so is redirected towards the ever hungry calves.

The plant is washed down after milking by pumping water containing acid or alkaline to sanitize all the clusters, pipes and pumps. This is done by means of these hot water tanks and tub. 

There are many switches, levers, buttons and handles to open, close, pull and switch. It took me about three weeks of forgetting something to learn how to do the wash. It is like driving the Tardis, and with washing down the whole shed and various yards and races, takes almost as long as the actual milking. 

I hope that gives you all an idea of what I get up to at stupid-o-clock in the morning and at very-full-of-lunch time in the afternoon. There will be more milking based posts to come. 

I have the weekend off now, and to save money (for a fishing rod and tackle), I am not doing anything apart from (re)watching all three of the Lord of the Rings films. I may watch a few action classics too, I'm thinking Bridge over the River Kwai and Zulu. I have no plans to move from this spot on the sofa at all.  

13. Top Ten Things Said To Cows

Whilst milking the other day, and thinking about what I should write about for the next blog post, it occurred to me to do a regular David Letterman style top ten.

Today's list is the top ten things said to cows, those of you who work with cows may recognise some of the terminology! 

10.   'Good Morn-yawn-ing' (when seeing cows for the first time at 4:15am)

9.   'Come on girly-wurlys!' (if you are my boss, David)

8.   'Stand still, Staaaaaaand still, stand still, STAND STILL!' (when trying to milk a particularly kicky cow)

7.   'Come on girls, Cooooome on, In you come, Come on, Push on, COOOOOMMME ONNNNNNNN, PUSH ON, COME ON GIRLS, PUSH UP PUSH UP PUSH UP, COME ON, IN YOU COME, PUSH UP, COME ON GIRLS, COME ON GIRLS, IN YOU COME, PUSH UP, PUSH UP, COME ON' (when rowing cows up for milking)

6.   '♪ ♫ ♪ ♫ ♪ ♫ ♪ ♫' (whistling when hoarse from shouting)

5.    'MOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!' (when they are not doing so, first half of word is in cow language so they definitely understand)

4.   '****' (when cow goes the wrong way somewhere)

3.   '****' (when cow stands on your foot)

2.   '****' (when kicked)

1.   '****' (when **** on)

Well the major news here is that Daniel has returned from Ireland full of Heineken (not a Guinness drinker - I know strange huh?). Which means Dana has now left, I drove her up to Omarama to catch her backpackers bus and continue on her exploration of NZ. The weather was great and the perfect blue sky meant driving conditions were excellent. On the way back I decided to make a detour to Danseys Pass, I had seen the road sign for it and was curious.

But before that I stopped off for a steak sandwich and a Speight's in Kurow. In the pub there, suitably decorated with photos of Richie McCaw and the flags of all the participating nations of the 2011 world cup, I got chatting to one of the most interesting and legendary people I have met in NZ so far.

For starters he looked like a retired pirate, big black bushy beard, long straggly hair, a very odd shapeless hat that looked like it was made of canvas and he genuinely had a gold hoop earring in one ear.
He sat there with a jug of dark ale and a very small glass that he took very rare sips from, I think he was trying to make the jug last all afternoon. He asked me where I was from, and was at first very suspicious until I explained that I was working on a dairy farm not too far away. It turns out he was in fact a retired cowboy, not a pirate. He said he had spent 26 years on a horse, mustering cattle in Australia and now moves from town to town every few months around NZ in a cart pulled by two horses. Apparently one of his horses had died so he had stayed in Kurow for longer than usual while he looked for a replacement. He uses solar panels and I think he said a 12ft battery, to power his radio and DVD player. He had a lot of useful bits of advice, not for travelling around NZ but for life generally. I don't think any of them could be repeated on here!

Anyway I got to Danseys Pass, which has now become my favourite road to drive anywhere in the world. It has a sign at the start that says whether or not the road is open to vehicles because it could get seriously dangerous in adverse weather conditions. It follows the Maerewhenua River for a while before rising high, very high, above it. I found a great spot to go fly fishing, I have a few months to get all the gear and license before the seasons starts in November.

The gravel road above the river offers some awesome views.

I had a few hairy moments while taking photos of the scenery and driving round some cliff edge corners. Thankfully an Italian Job ending did not happen.

On the way back I drove past a bit of venison chilling in a well grazed paddock, it still seems odd to me despite the large amount of deer farming in the area. The second photo is from a few weeks ago when a couple of overly friendly beasts came to say hello.

Righto, that'll be all for now. I'll be back soon.

12. Cloudstown

This post comes to you from a blog that has now had over 5000 pageviews! This means that either quite a few people are reading it, or that just a few people are reading it a bit too much! I thank you for taking the time to look at my photos and read about my experiences here in NZ. I assure you that there will be many more posts to come.

Anyway, last weekend I went to Queenstown, famous for its adrenaline sports, skiing and according to a well regarded guidebook, its 'competitive drinking'.

I am not a fan of extreme sports. I am aware that the adrenaline rush feels good, but I am also aware that adrenaline is a chemical naturally produced by the body when in extreme danger. Take bungee jumping for example, I use bungee cord to secure small light things, such as a toolbox or a coat onto the quad bike. Quite regularly it doesn't work and things fall off. I weigh about 12 and a half stone, so I would not trust that stretchy rope. Hence why I avoid adrenaline sports!

I am also not much of a skier, having never skied on a mountain before, I would need a few lessons. As well as hiring all the gear, the cost starts to add up. So, the logic might suggest that I focused on the third aspect of the towns reputation, it being NZ's most popular 'party-town' , which I didn't. Much.

In actual fact I went to meet up with two friends from home who are doing the 'Kiwi Experience', backbacking and hopping on and of buses all around NZ (having already done Aus!) Staying with them in the hostel gave me a bit of an insight into the other way of seeing NZ, as opposed to my way of mini excursions when I get the chance. In fairness, my roster of 8 days on, 2 off, 8 on, 3 off, is pretty good and better than most who dairy farm I bet.

I drove to Queenstown (about 280 km), most of it in the rain. Meaning I missed out on a lot of very impressive countryside as I concentrated on staying on the road. On the way I, and a few other cars, found our way blocked by one or two Merino sheep.

I think they were on their way to get shorn. I saw a lot of near naked sheep on the way, looking very clean, but a bit nippy!

When I got to Queenstown the weather, reminiscent of a Welsh summer, was still miserable. I feel like I didn't see the town at its best. The clouds severely hampered the views that are so famous and postcard friendly. The alpine town seemed nice though, with lots of shops selling ski gear, lots of bars and lots of boats offering rides, cruises and tours of Lake Wakatipu. Eventually the rain stopped a bit and I managed to get a few snaps of the view across the lake.

That night I had a good catch up with my friends, it was very strange to see familiar faces so far from home. We went out with a load of their fellow backpackers firstly to get what turned out to be the the greatest burger I have ever eaten. Better than my homemade lamb burgers the other week. Fergburger is a legendary establishment and my naive skepticism was found to be completely unfounded. The Fergburger with Blue Cheese was incredible and I had another one the following day, this time, a Double Fergburger with Blue Cheese. Just looking at this photo makes me want another one.

After the top quality lining of the stomach, we went and had a few beverages. Including one which was served in a china tea-pot. I am guilty of paying an extortionate amount of money for an average drink, far too much ice and a few minutes of novelty! There was a few moments of serious decision making whether to drink out of the spout or lift the lid and use it like a mug. Obviously I went spout and there is a photo of me doing so somewhere, but that will never find its way onto this blog!

The following day after a poor nights sleep in a small bunk-bed, in a stiflingly hot 10-bed dorm room, the weather had improved. The clouds were still covering the high ground, and it is the high ground where we went to explore. We went on the famous gondola that rises up 'Bob's Peak' to offer stunning views of the mountains, lakes and town below.

At least I assume the views are stunning, but the clouds were white and thick, and I could have been anywhere in the world, in a cloud. The Māori name for New Zealand is Aotearoa, which translates as 'The Land of the Long White Cloud.' I think the long white cloud was all bunched up over Queenstown when I was there. 

I managed to get a few pics of the mountain tops peeking out opaque whiteness. At the time they did look very dramatic. I will return on a clear day and get myself a proper photo of the panorama.

I am aware that these three photos are very similar, but I thought the occasion warranted a few pictures. Especially seeing as the photo of the burger found its way on.

Whilst we were up on the top of the hill, we went on the luge, which involved an ill-fitting helmet and some seriously impressive overtaking on my part. There were two tracks, the 'Scenic Route', or the 'Advanced Route'. It has to be said that there really wasn't much difference between the two. On both, there were far too many automatic cameras taking unexpected photos. Here is an 'official' one of me with a race-winning grimace, having just Lewis-Hamiltoned my way to the the front! (Louise and Hannah, now minor celebs for appearing on this blog, struggled to keep the pace up).

The laws of gravity mean that the heaviest person wins, so to be fair, I don't know how much of the finishing order relates to driver skill.

Queenstown was good fun and I'm looking forward to returning later on in the year, I fancy renting a kayak and exploring the lake. Or maybe a spot of fly-fishing. A more gentle past time than the skiing/bungee jumping/paragliding/sky diving etc etc that makes the town such a haven for thrill-seekers.

My drive back home was much better than the journey out, the lack of rain meant I could see some of the awesome landscapes that the area is so famous for. I think at some point I took a detour through Middle Earth and passed by some very impressive country.I half expected to see a few Riders of Rohan round the next corner, and this river looks decidedly Gollum-esque. I warn you that the Lord of the Rings references will continue as long as I am exploring the countryside of NZ!

The Remarkables - living up to their name

I took these two photos whilst driving, a useful skill I have developed.

I am a big fan of the rugged country, I have far too many photos of hills, mountains, lakes and very distant hawks to put on this blog!


It is getting near my bed time so I will have to call it a day on the blogging front. My alarm goes off at 4:10 am so I hit the hay pretty early at the moment!

I will just use this opportunity to wish my sister Victoria a happy 128th birthday (last Sunday). Also I'd like to congratulate my former colleague (he thought he was my boss) and friend Sam on his engagement, he's taken the plunge and decided that the farmer needs a wife! Good luck to her!

Thanks for reading, here's to the next 5000 views!